Friday, April 08, 2005

Introduction to a Fake Blog

Hello, welcome to my blog. The only blog you will ever need because I satisfy all needs. The needs for sleep, food, sex, love, lust, water, babies, space travel, life on distant planets, American football, smiles, cries, fear, jealousy and most important of all.... Revenge. The most vital, affirmative and beautiful need known to man. The seed from which this blog blossomed.
But don't get me wrong, loyal readers. I am not trying to exact bloody Quentin Tarantino revenge. The revenge I want will stay with my enemy until his day of natural death. It will leave an acidic taste in his mouth reminding him that I am better. Because that is my revenge. To create a better blog than his. It begins with this post and ends with his tears. And best of all is he will never know. Ever.
You are asking why. I can hear you. "Why?". Unfortunately, for you, the answer to this has been lost in time. Mother spider fed it to her disgusting offspring, so to speak. But, deep inside my soul, small intestine or whatever your religion calls it, I can feel the rage shining. A Holy Light lighting the dark path to wondrous glory. I am righteous and my name is revenge.

2 comments:

  1. I have no sympathy for Mr.Vengeance. Good luck on your quest young boy.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Jesus, Robert, what did you eat??

    ReplyDelete