The steely-eyed samurai swordsman glared at his opponent. The focus of his gaze stared back with equal venom. "Tashiro," he shouted, "Do not do this." Tashiro responded by placing his hand on the hilt of his katana. His glare deepened. "Tashiro, I beg of you, please."
"Fine then, Tashiro, you leave me no choice." His sword flickered into the air with startling speed. "I will kill him."
"Why not Tashiro? What of me, and my feelings? What of all those nights we spent together, gobbling each others cocks? I will not let him have you, and I do not understand why you will not leave him for me. I will kill him."
"No buts... I must do this."
"I will not allow it."
"Then I will kill you too."
"Fine, to save our lives... I will leave him."
With that the two samurai sprinted into each others arms.
A little over a mile away all the samurai in the garrison were having gay sex aswell, except for one or two who claimed not to "lean that way", but everyone doubted them.