Friday, April 29, 2005

Time Travel. An Update.

Some of you may remember my post of April 25th 2005, in that post I set out to prove or even disprove the theory that one day time travel will be possible. After much study, research and laziness it is time for an update.

I am mildly disappointed to inform you all that I am 66% certain that time travel will never be a possibility. The magnificient people of the future have one more chance to prove me wrong but this oppurtunity will not present itself untill early June. Come June, if no time traveller appears I will be 99% certain that time travel will never be possible. This leaves a 1% uncertainty factor to account for the theory that at some stage in the future I become supreme overlord of the planet. Noble prize money and hot science chicks, here I come.

39 comments:

  1. Shouldn't you be studying. I am. It's shit and I'm falling asleep.
    POOP.

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  2. I should be. I am looking at military surplus instead.

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  3. Woo-hoo. Depleted Uranium kicks ass... I assume.
    It's totally possible for you to become supreme overlord. You are American, after all. It reminds me of our plan... Do you remember? From... oh, so long ago.

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  4. Of course I remember it. It was a damn good plan. Wait, it still is a good plan.

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  5. Hey, go to pitchfork and check out the singles section. They have a review for a song called born into this world, I think, by a band called Soundsystem. There's a download of it.
    Do it. I am right now.

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  6. Ian, i think you're being ridiculous here. What if the travellers from the future are under strict directives about what they can and can't do in the past? Even come June, you can in now way be certain that it's impossible.

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  7. I agree with Daly.
    Time travel is a very tricky thing.
    You should read Doomsdaybook by Connie Willis, I don't kow if you'll like it b/c even though t is about the black plague and is very gross it is sort of girly. and maybe even her book To Say Nothing of the Dog which is sort of stupid but I like the title. Connie Willis has great time travel theories.

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  8. I have loads of time travel theories, I just can't coherently communicate them. The fact that time travellers might have travel restrictions comes under the 1% uncertainty factor. I'll never be 100% sure but I don't see any of the rest of you motherfuckers doing anything scientifically positive, or anything illegal for that matter.

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  9. You're placing possible future time travel restrictions as part of a 1% uncertainty? Meanin that it's less than 1%?

    You may want to reassess that.

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  10. No, I wont be reassessing anything. I am mega-great, you are merely good. Therefore I win.
    Motherfucker.

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  11. As you would technically only need one Time Traveler's conference it is probably being held in a different time zone so one one has the need or desire to drop by this one.

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  12. Look, this is a futile conversation. The cylons are going to fuck us up before we invent the time machine anyway. I've seen it.

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  13. I'm going to fuck those cylons, me and Dirk Benedict, the real fucking Starbuck. Dirk was already on to Mr. T, he's going to make us a totally sweet space ship then while some bad ass ninja wails on guitar we are going to fly some cylon dumpass planet and beat them like their daddys used to.

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  14. I think you'll find that the real Starbuck is a woman and not some old man called Dirk.

    Anyway, i'm on the side of the Cylons, so I guess that pretty much wraps it up for humanity.

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  15. Daly you fucking screaming queen. If I ever see you in college I'm going to give you a euro so you can go buy a fucking clue, you insignificant motherfucker. No actually wait, it will have to be substantially more than a mere euro due to your profound lack of eloquence, sophistication and intelligence. "oh look at me I'm the Daly Rage" Yeah real fucking cool, give yourself an internet nickname, everyone thinks thats cool. Using the door is cool, you fucking tight wearing beverage. Eat my ass you fucking cylon whore. Yeah like Cylons could accomplish much anyway, the motherfuckers are metallic, just dump a bucket of seawater over them and BAM! corroded cylon, yeah real fucking scary. MOTHERFUCKER!

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  16. LOLOLOLO

    Take the euro Ian, and shove it into your eye. With a little luck it'll reach your brain and our suffering will end.

    No but seriously, why so worked up? Is it cos Me and the Cylons are going to fuck you up? Also I think you'll find that you misquoted me on the Daly Rage thing. I'd say something more like: "Oh YEAH, look at me, I'm The Rage." That's just for future reference. Also, it's not in internet nickname. On the internet I go by Daly as you can quite obviously see. It seems that you are the one who is the one who is the ball-licker and has no clue.

    Anyway, I'm going back to the Base Star for some Legend/Cylon relations. Number 6 looks like she's up for some.

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  17. Im not worked up, I just felt like writing an angry post. I enjoyed writing it. And just so you know Daly, Starbuck was originally played by Dirk Benedict, also Face in The A-Team, in the 1978 series. So he is infact the real Starbuck that blonde dyke is just a replica.

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  18. Well FYI Ian: Fuck Dirk Benedict. New Starbuck is where it's at.

    And don't presume to tell me anything about BSG or the A-Team. Thanks.

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  19. Suck my ass you fucking cunt. I just did tell you something about BSG so get your overpresumptious ass over it.

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  20. I would suck your ass (or at least i'd pay Rob to) but your head is in the way.

    And i'm not overpresuming anything. You're the person who (over)presumed to tell me something.

    Now stop crying like a good boy.

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  21. You are a pathetic, petty, ignoble technofreak who is more comfortable fondling a computer than speaking to a real person. I have something you can never hope to have Karl, an attractive personality.

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  22. Oh and by the way thank you for noticing where my head is. I have been really working at yoga recently, it was such a challenge getting my head here but I am totally proud right now.

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  23. Oooh, out come the big guns, or at least the biggest you could manage.

    Listen, good luck with that attractive personality Ian. I suppose you need something to get by 'cos you obviously haven't much else. Fair play on that. You might lend your argument some credibility if you even knew me, but i guess credibilty is another thing you lack... but hey, that attractive personality will make up for it, you hope.

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  24. Damn, you had to throw in the comic aside, and i was just starting to enjoy this.

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  25. It must make you feel bad then that i'm so much better than you.

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  26. Not really, I have mega cool spiderman shoes.

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  27. You know Daly, I don't think I've ever seen you make a face like that in real life...

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  28. WOO Rob, remember the time Doc sold his swords? Or pretty much any time I talk about DBZ. Or during most of Arrested Development. Or BLAH BLAH BLAH TO INFINITY.

    You've got a case of selective memory going on there.

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  29. I meant, I've never seen your head tilted at that angle before. Snap.

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  30. WOO Rob, have you not seen me do an impression of that Law and Order guy? I think it's Law and Order, one of those fucking cop shows.

    You've got a case of selective memory going on there.

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  31. What I really meant was that I've never seen your face being two dots and a half circle.

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  32. Aah, OK, sorry. Misunderstanding.

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  33. My cousin Dan was in Law & Order.

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  34. Oh yeah? That's cool. Was he a cop or a witness or a perp?

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  35. I'm not sure, I didn't think of asking, next time I mail him I will ask though. I think he was in the spin off Special Victims something.

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